There are lots of reasons that teenagers reject their parents. It’s common, a normal part of defining their own identity separate from that of their family.
When a parent has been abusive towards the child, this can lead to estrangement – a justified rejection from the child who wishes to protect themselves from further hurt. Abused children tend to feel ambivalent towards their parent – loving them and wanting to please them on one hand, while simultaneously feeling angry and hurt on the other, and mixed in with all this is a feeling of guilt, a sense that maybe the problem lies with some fault within themselves.
Children who have been alienated [URL: http://parentalalienation.com.au], however, show a different set of behaviours/feelings:
[PLEASE FORMAT THE FOLLOWING NICELY AS A BULLET POINT LIST]
• They denigrate their parent with foul language and extreme contempt;
• The reasons given for their anger are frivolous, don’t make sense, and often trivial in relation to the intensity of the anger;
• The reasons include ‘borrowed scenarios’ – i.e., they are angry with the parent for things that never happened to the child, but happened to the other parent;
• There is no confusion, uncertainty, ambivalence – only abject hatred;
• The child insists that they, alone, uninfluenced, came up with the ideas of denigration;
• They support the favoured parent and feel a need to protect them;
• The child does not show any guilt over the extreme cruelty they have displayed towards the rejected parent;
• The anger is extended towards people who are associated with the rejected parent, such as friends and family members.